in my field of paper flowers
and candy clouds of lullaby
i lie inside myself for hours
and watch my purple sky fly over me
i linger in the doorway
of alarm clock screaming monsters calling my name
let me stay where the wind will whisper to me
where the raindrops as they're falling tell a story
nadirs and zeniths
life fluctuates around ups and downs
it's strange how quickly life can change in a second
all i rely on is that one bright spark to fulfil my day
when it's not there i feel totally shite. how screwed.
went out with m yesterday
we wanted to skip the principal's oh-so-boring talk
she's a nice lady, but hey, she's boring ok !
so we hung out at the heritage cafe together
talked about stuff as usual.
made plans for the night
so i went home later on. yawns
logged on to train some war3.
went out later on to meet m
met manda's boyfriend, james on the bus toward Harbourfront !
haha ! never talked to him much before, but he's pretty cool
he's really nice too, lent me his California Fitness membership card
so i could get 10% discount off at The Cafe Cartel in Cineleisure
yay. now i had dinner plans for the night.
we talked about church, lan, sports, life etc. he's quite interesting to talk to
haha. took the train to Dhoby. he went to Kovan
met up with m outside cheers at Cine (yeah my life seems to revolve around there, xing)
and we ended up at The Cafe Cartel. hahaha. (:
it's always nice to talk to her, she's pleasant company
we walked around Orchard for awhile, couldn't stomach the St Louis Ribs man..
my appetite seems to be getting shitty recently. and i think i know why
sent her home later on.
...
today was total rubbish, though
i didn't go to school. didn't have any lessons i wanted to attend
went over anyway to collect my 50 from thow
went in outside clothes, so the guard kinda stopped me and asked for my ID
haha. so i had a visitor's pass (:
met the guys at LT4, they had some stupid healthtalk which never started
we hung around outside, then i earned $2.50 for going in and dismissing the people
stupid bets makes the world go round.
felt damn jaded. the rest couldn't go out
and somebody wasn't returning my calls. so heck la.
went to e-games to stone.
wasted $7.50 worth of my time and money.
it's $2.50 an hour, i played 3hrs and 47minutes. and they charged me $7.50
looks like i cheated them of an hour's worth. hah.
bad day too. we won only 2 games. lost like.. 5?
don't know. wasn't in a mood to play, was feeling damn off and confused.
but heck la, i've just reached the point of 'i-don't-care-anymore-till-the-next-time-comes'
it's always like that
my life fluctuates because of this. haha.
so screwed isn't it
never felt like that before, it's a first
...
talked to xing over the phone
he's great to talk to
hope you'll get over your nadirs like me.
i just take my shit when it comes
though i dwell loads on it.. well, depending on the case
i still get over it and look over the next hill to the brighter side right ?
...
still not getting any replies.
so i guess i'll just switch my phone to silent for the night
ris says she'll call me later
i need to talk to her
think i need some counselling damn bad
i'm screwing up spiritually and worldly
hahah. i'm such a screw-up
don't even know why i bother with myself still.
shiate.
sheng just fucked his life up but no one gave a shit
